The Rocker (2008, Peter Cattaneo)

When The Rocker came (and, just as swiftly, went), there appeared to be no end for critics that would bemoan Rainn Wilson's would-be status as a Jack Black also-ran, starring, as he does, as a never-was drummer for a hair band on the cusp of superstardom. It plays as the direct-to-video sequel to School of Rock, consequently, and Rainn-- so incredibly funny on "The Office"-- constantly invites comparisons to more successful film comedians. He combines Jack Black's chubbly rock-cliche energy with Will Ferrell's overgrown man-child tendencies to create a wholly derivative comic character; unfortunate, considering that a.) he's responsible for "Office"'s Dwight Schrute, a singular and iconic comic creation, and b.) he actually services the role pretty well for what it is.


The movie that he's in, sadly, is pretty uneven. The movie kicks off with a pretty inspired opening sequence, starring a delightful comedic who's-who as Vesuvius, the cookie-cutter Poison-esque band Fish (Wilson) gets booted from on the eve of uber-fame. Will Arnett, Fred Armisen, and Bradley Cooper hilariously mug for the camera in this extended prologue, and it's a wistful nod in the direction The Rocker should have gone. Unfortunately, by the time Wilson joins his nephew's Disney-pop band, the movie only sprints some of the time, preferring to limp, ball-less, toward its inevitable conclusion. (Seriously, if you've ever seen a movie before, do you really think the aging rocker isn't gonna get kicked out of the band? and then subsequently reunite? these are not spoilers if you've ever seen a movie EVER)

Part of the problem is the band's style. I could've seen Wilson joining a punk band or a junior metal band and then, Superbad-style, tramping off into the night. Howling. But this is tween pop. It's the Jonas Brothers. It'd be one thing for the movie to send-up the squeaky-clean band this raunchy rocker has wandered into, mining the contrast for optimum comic capabilities, but it doesn't. The Rocker is a very, very SAFE movie. A little more danger would serve it well.

But, lest you think all is wrong with The Rocker, it offers a few more great nuggets of comic potential. SNL's Jason Sudeikis has a lot of fun with the stock role of douchey agent -- he's super-smug, and his timing is perfect. And Christina Applegate really works with what she's offered; unfortunately, what she's offered is a half-baked would-be romance with Wilson that goes nowhere, but that doesn't make her any less endearing. Meanwhile, the teens in the band are a mixed bag. There's Josh Gad doing his Jonah Hill thing -- seriously, side-by-side their mannerisms -- but he's pretty fantastic at it, doing an uncanny approximation while bringing some real heart to the proceedings; meanwhile, Superbad scene-grabber Emma Stone is just as wonderful here as she was in that film, all sardonic and adorable, and looking a little bit like a non-filthy, talented version of Lindsay Lohan. Unfortunately, this band is fronted by the astoundingly mediocre musician Teddy Geiger, the cute little teen who writes cute little teen songs, here playing a tortured musician with daddy issues, and proving that while his music may be mediocre, his acting is quite awful. (Still, it provides Stone with a great meta-quip about inter-band stereotypes.)

So, yeah. The Rocker is utterly toothless and predictable -- and that's sad, because there's some moments of glorious comic potential creeping around here. Not a horrible film, no -- but it's a mediocre one.

Also, any movie that wastes Jane Lynch loses major brownie points. Seriously, this is one of the funniest women in the world. How do you have her doing rote soccer-mom shtick?


Rating: **1/2 (out of five)